"I see high school as a big game of Survivor, the most popular, come out on top"

the CATHOLIC BOYS "Psychic Voodoo Mind Control" (Trickknee CD) I'm sure everyone here has heard the overused cliche' "After fill in the blank was created they broke the mold." Rest assured the Catholic Boys have heard it plenty of times...and it doesn't help them sleep them peacefully at night either. The idea of "If they broke the mold that means they probably threw it in the trash afterwards" keep them tossing and turning in their mattresses. It drives their minds to the point of snapping! Dumpster diving and diggin' holes in the landfill becomes an obsession. Collecting shards & slivers and gluing 'em together with spit, jizz and lungbutter. Jagged chunks of the Reatards and Devo are worked in a jigsaw puzzled approach finding ways to fit in next to slices of Flipper and the Bay City Rollers. Standing back to admire what they have made they still feels it needs something more. Hunting under the couch cushions, the bathroom medicine cabinet and the bottom of Huber bottles for gimcrack such as the dust that collects under the record player needle from a sweet thrift shop find, discarded pizza crusts, the weed resin left at the end of a jackknife during one of those "it seems like this entire part of the country is dry" bowl scraping moments and a busted up Motorhead record adorn it's outer layer. Purists, nerds and them dudes (and they always are dudes) who are "all about the RAWK" are scared and/or confused by the Catholic Boys antsy stop/starts and bickering guitar crack ups but them types are clowns anyways but for those who want a ball of electricity that colors outside the lines listening to this should be on top of the list. Ten years from now people will be declaring this a one of the classics of the ought decade. Lemme beat 'em ten years to the punch by saying the exact thing right now. (Contact Trickknee for more info) dm

the SMUT PEDDLERS "Coming Out" (TKO CD) Motherfuckers, ok its partly my fault for writing my reviews in my e-mail but goddammit I hate when CD's hijack my explorer window and redirect it and make me lose the 3 other reviews I wrote. So now I'm pissed and I'm reviewing this one first thing after my hijacking. Ok man what's the deal? Can you not figure out something better to write about than the fact that you used to be a junkie? 90% of the songs are about the drugs you used to do. When you were doing them did you write songs only about the drugs you were on? This gets very old very quick. I can appreciate someone straightening their life out and kicking a habit (I've kicked a few myself) but your just glorifying the drugs you don't do anymore. All in all I'm not impressed. (TKO) bb

the JET SET "We've Got The Dance Connection" (Wee Rock CD) Though the Jet Set are obviously mining a really drunken 6T's thang with the Farafisa's and Danelectro's there some screwy New Wave nuances wandering in and out. Mixing some Rum into a chocalate shake the Jet Set could make a huge mess at the right party. (The Jet Set) dm

the SPAMCHORDS "Bingo Royal" (Yakisakana one sided 7in EP) It's Nils a from Superhelicopter thing!!!! Really, what more do you need to know? Dammit! I guess I'll be nice and take into consideration those who don't understand what they are getting into. Superhelicopter were (Are? Who the fuck knows if Nils has retired the name for good) one of the greatest pieces of red lined noise to vibrate a needle in eons! Insolent crud thud in not just broken but totally busted pilsner quaffing and kraut crunching English is what Nils has always dealt and he ain't planning on budging from it anytime soon. Boogie blues get's brain damaged in a blackjack thrash battle. Crank it full blast and it'll not only shred the speakers but might tear heads clean off too. (Yakisakana) dm

DEVIL TO PAY "Thirty Pieces Of Silver" (Benchmark CD) I've been in the mood for some Kyuss but my pot dealer has been out of town all week and without the grass it just isn't the same. Devil To Pay know exactly what I mean. They probably have a quonset hut full of mean green. I bet it's the same place they jam at too. I wonder if there's any roaches in the ashtray of my car because Devil To Pay's bong rock deserves at least a couple of ice cubed chilled double carbed one hits. (Benchmark) wkm

the TRELIKS "Mexican Road Movie" (Face Value 7in.) Two "very british" mod/soul/pop/new wave looks & sounds here. The b-side, "Ride Inside Her Lies", is the better of the two sounding sorta akin to the (English) Beat coming up with something that might possibly remind a person of Brix era Fall. Better than Franz Ferdinand at least. (Face Value) dm

KILL THE HIPPIES "Jerked Off By Strangers" (Fighting Fun 7in EP) When I opened the envelope that this record came in my first reaction was "These freakbags are still around?!?" Yep! They sure are. And yes, they still are freakbags. They're definitely hard to pigeonhole or pin down. Fellow Smashin' Transistors reviewer Sleeve stopped by while I was giving this a listen and the whole time he had a perplexed look on his face. He then noticed that they were from Kent, Ohio and exclaimed "Now it's making sense" and proceeded to tell me a story about a time when he was there and someone was selling some really intense acid at a dollar a hit. (Kill The Hippies) dm

SOUNDS LIKE BRAILLE "Right out of Left Field Straight to the Middle of Nowhere" (Contraphonic CD) Insane people sometimes hear voices in their heads. And with the way technology is heading robots will be doing actual thinking soon. Will they consider the sound of a dial up modem as classical music? If their brains go haywire will this band's sound fill the robots brain instead of crazy voices? I'm no Isaac fucking Asimov but it could very will be. (Contraphonic) wkm

the HUNCHES "Hobo Sunrise" (In The Red CD) When the Hunches first fell to earth it took me quite a few go arounds before it began to sink in. While some of my zine geek peers embraced the band the first time their sound filled their ears I continued to circle at arm's length distance then BAM!!! It felt like they dropped a ton of bricks on my head.This time around I was instantly clobbered. Everything they were attempting on their first album has been mastered this time around. At times thunderstorms leave a path of destruction behind them. Nature shows no concern for anything but itself. It's common for tornado's to form in such inclimate weather and as it's knocking down power lines and ripping trees out of the ground it's also washing away messes from one place and dropping it at another. Such a time of the season is the Hunches sound. Locomotive sounding gusts blowing in glass windows like a cannon with 10 lbs of gun powder, apple sized hail violently bashing four walls and roof, eerie and unsettling calms between the rounds of batterings and finally the all clear to come out of the basement and survey the damage. Transformers popping, mangled metal and busted branches scattered as far as the eye can see. There's beauty in it's destruction because before some thing can be born something else has to die. Amazing record! (In The Red) dm

the TYRADES "I Am Homicide" (Shit Sandwich 7in EP) The cops in this town like to whip out a taser in plenty of situations but sometimes it doesn't subdue the suspect enough to please them. You wanna be some crazy fuck brandishing a box cutter and slicing yourself with up it and getting zapped with voltage doesn't calm ya down...They have no need to pull out nightsticks and use physical intervention. They got guns! I thought about turning this record up to a level where the entire block could here this just once but I thought against cuz the badge would think they hit some total jackpot from hearing the squall and would tear gas the place. Then they'd call in a SWAT to helicopter in from Flint to do their work before they'd declare the premises safe to enter. Disturbed and perturbed the Tyrades make a sound fitting for someone plotting the arson of an asylum for glue sniffing casualties and those who can't find a buzz that matches that of listening to the Germs while receiving electroshock therapy. (Shit Sandwich) dm

the BONNIE PARKERS "Sweaty Shirts & Bloody Fingers" (Be Nice To Mommy CD) Hey I've not only heard these vocals like this before I hang out with the original "superstar" who spouted them. When the hell did Screamin' Joe Burdick move to Italy? The mix needs a little help on this CD even played at loud volumes. Its kinda flat. Mix this one to vinyl boys and you'd have yourself a sure fire winner that'll stay in the vicinity of my turntable for weeks. (Bonnie Parkers) bb

SEGER LIBERATION ARMY "2+2=?" (Big Neck 7in) Step one inch out of the midwest and extol the virtues of Bob Seger and people will wonder why you're raving about the grandpa rocker who sang that song that Tom Cruise danced around to in his underwear in "Risky Business." This can lead a midwesterner off in a rant like "Fuck 'Live Bullet'! Fuck 'Fire Lake'! I'm talking the Bob Seger System...I'm talking the Last Herd! I'm talking 'Heavy Music'! I ain't talking no song from "Beverly Hills Cop!" Tom Potter and co. remember a time when Old Man Blob meant belting it out to get something of your chest then partying down and having a good time NOT doing duets with pop country singers, hanging out with Glen Frey and sailing a yacht around Mackinac Island. (Big Neck) dm

the FEELERS "Fuhrer's New Miniskirt" (Death By Noise 7in EP) I bet the Feelers look all unassuming as they pick up their guitars, drumsticks and microphones. Then when they hit the first chord bottles start flying, tables get turned over and the soundman starts yelling "Do you want me to ban you from here!". Dropping the New Bomb Turks name might be lazy cuz both bands cut their teeth in the city of Columbus, Ohio but I do hear some of the same type of snotty and spun up mindset that made "Destroy-Oh-Boy!" worthy of having it grooves worn out. The difference is that the Feelers sound less catty...More like they are cranking it out FOR you instead of AT you. (the Feelers) dm

SINGING DOGS "Suck The Dog" (P.Trash 7in EP) The first single I heard from these pasta pushers they were a duo, on the second one I got they were a trio. This is the third single by 'em that has landed on my turntable and I wondered if they were now a quartet. Nah, it seems the 3 piece thing is working good for 'em. Fried out 3 chord beat up and lost in a swamp trash played by some dirtbags who probably don't know any better and most likely don't care either. (P Trash) dm

BLACK TIME "Blackout" (Concrete Life LP) Very contrasted black & white reverberations getting splattered with bright red blood. Like basement walls whitewashed to give an illusion of uncontaminated coolness there's a dense and foggy dankness that saturates the air. Trash can art damaged kicked in the skull skronk that'll stir the hips and put dangerous thoughts in the head. It may seem asymmetrical at first then the line frays off into ditches of fuzz and uphill marching. If Pussy Galore wanted to make the audience dance instead of fiending to alienate them it might equal what the Black Time are doing right here in the now time. They drill their sound into the spinal chord and slowly let it's shanga-clang seep deep into bodily fluids til every inch of gray matter is soaking in it. (Black Time) dm

the VON ZIPPERS "The Crime Is Now" (Alien Snatch LP) Straight up traditional power chord riffing rock. They sound like their big fans of Social Distortion, Rocket From the Crypt and KISS. Something I'd slap on at a party and have a good time but some of the lyrical themes come off a bit heavy so it bums out the drunks that want to hear songs about drinking, slutty chicks and hot rods. (Alien Snatch) wkm

the FE FI FO FUMS "Here Comes..." (Boom Boom Of Renton 7in.) With some of the most smudged "walkman in the middle of the room" fidelity since any side of South City the Fe Fi Fo Fums take it back about ten years or so ago where if it was 7inches with a big hole and had a cheap photocopied looking cover it was gonna be a loud and cruddy party night favorite. Moronic gee-rahge stomp for those who missed it the first time and those who want to relive the Budget Rock days but are to lazy/dumb/drunk to get off their couch and dig through their record collection. (Boom Boom OF Renton) dm

TUNNEL OF LOVE "#013" (Tapesrecords 7in EP) It ain't all that hard to have a rock band and act all damaged. Be it Jim Morrison and his hoary ramblings about snakes-n-fire then showing his dick, the dork from the Vines throwing a temper tantrum and breaking a microphone on a late night TV talk show or Marilyn Manson walking around with fake tits while touting comic book version of a moral apocalypse it's all an act...it's for your entertainment, just make sure the camera is running. Those who find comfort in staring at the cathode ray like the buffer zone between what's an act and what is reality. I guess folks sleep better knowing that Ozzy may be the Lord Of Darkness on stage but in real life he's got a wife browbeating the hell out of him, a fat ass son who whines all the time and an even fatter daughter who whines even more. This largely explains why the likes of the clowns I mentioned have gotten all the cash-n-pussy-n-drugs and their faces in glossy magazines while someone like Hasil Adkins resides in a decrepit old shack with no cable TV and VH1 ain't calling up the Electric Eels to feature them in an episode of "Behind The Music". Tunnel Of Love are certainly in the latter group. They are doctors of tapping into a lost recess of minds by using an aural match of a rusted and worn drill bit...The banged up and burning buzz doesn't act as much as an anesthetic-it's more like a nerve agent. Cranium's get broiled by repugnant guitar scuzz then bashed into pulp by a sledgehammer on a rusted quarter panel beat. Didn't The Cheater Slicks skip outta Boston cuz no one understood their crackbrained dementia. The Tunnel Of Love take a similar growl, scream and pummel so deep into the dirt they might awake one evening to find the same clueless townsfolk torching their digs in hopes it'll rid the area of such sickness for good. It's too late though cuz once this stuff finds it way into the ground water. (Tunnel Of Love) dm

the BLANK ITS "Johnny's Tongue" (Blank It's 7in) Man, just when my mailbox gets overwhelmed by promos of shit bag rawk groups, dull '77 style photocopies and fashion horses claiming their ideas come from different time and space drive me to a point to where I feel like I wanna cash out on this punk rock stuff once and for all and change the direction of the website to being about listening to "the Big 8 CKLW" in the back of my dad's Pontiac while drinking a bottle of Squirt in the summer of 1973 something like this comes along. Mangled two finger chords...and a high strung backbeat. The Blank Its sound like some insurrectionists that stumbled into making off kilter splendor not by some calculated design but by bustling into it face first and not worrying about any consequences. Think of them as if the Urinals at their most agitated writing songs they'd like to hear the Monkees cover. Then take that idea, cram it into an empty Chef Boyardee Ravioli can and roll it down a hill into expressway traffic. (Contact the Blank Its) dm

VEE DEE "Further" (Criminal IQ CD) Anybody out there remember the band Vertigo? Vee Dee have a similar drunk driving sound punctuated with KBD like guitar slurs and a feeling that a shower of intense acid and enzymes activators even couldn't wash off all the rejectamenta that permiates the sound. (Vee Dee) dm

the COMPULSIONS "21 Powers Street" (self released CDEP) It sounds like this band is having a really hard time making up their mind whether they want to sound like Johnny Thunders post Heartbreakers or a band that once appeared on the original motion picture soundtrack of a John Hughes movie. (The Compulsions) wkm

STIMULATOR s/t (Stimulator CD) For months there was this guy who ran an ad in the paper saying "Female vocalist wanted for recording project. Influences include Stacey Q, Garbage and Pink." Someone must've finally answered it. (Stimulator) dm

the DETONATIONS "Static Disaster" (Alive CD) I keep a Discman by the door that leads into my backyard. It's an important part of yard work equipment for me. When I'm out there raking up leaves and piles of dogshit, ripping weeds away from the fence line and picking up the trash that blows in I need tunes that are gonna get me hopped up. When I'm out there with sweat dripping off my nose as I give the pull cord 10 or more good yanks to fire up 6.5 horses of grass slicing action I don't want some frilly "butterflies and sunshine" sounds. I need something where the "GRRRRRR!! GRRRRRR!!" of the lawnmower accents what's blasting through the headphones not distracting from it. I tried out a couple of different things this summer but I always came back to the Detonations. Working up a sweaty nasty smell from busting ass in the heat their ham hocked dirt rockin' gets me through the chores and keeps me focused on the cold beer that's in my fridge when I get it all done. (the Detonations) dm

v/a "Maybe Chicago" (Criminal IQ CD) I don't remember when it was when I first thought "Chicago...Fun town...some cool people but JESUS CHRIST!!! DO THE BANDS THAT COME FROM THERE EVER SUCK!!!" but it's been a long time now. The last couple of years or so though have had me re-thinking that belief. Yeah, Chicago is still a town where a blast can be had and there's still a bunch of right on folks there but THERE'S SOME GOOD BANDS COMING FROM OUTTA THERE! Hell, the comp even starts with Horizontal Action's overlord of drunken hi-jinks Uncle Ted explaining his actions on yet another evening already falling into double vision'd debauchery. The next sound is the Functional Blackouts getting all wiggly and jabbing a rusty and bloodstained screwdriver through the speakers which starts off an hour tour of rat infested alleys, bare light bulbed basements, dingy dives with cheap drafts and other corners of Chi-town the locals warn the out of towners to avoid....Ya survived an here's a souvenir to take back home with ya. Highlights include the Ponys (Jared of the Ponys recorded most of the bands on this in shambling yet snug fidelity as well), the Hot Machines and Ross of the Brides/Aron of the Baseball Furies new thing called the Dirges. Actually there's a lot of cool bands on here...the Tyrades, Vee Dee, the White Outs....Chi-town is sure making up for some lost time and some bad rock because everything on this is worth atleast a few spins in the player. But getting back to the Dirges...FUCK YEAH! I'm really looking forward to hearing more from them. I'm still kicking my ass for missing them at Blackout '04 (Ironically enough, I was at Aron's apartment partying and asking "What time are the Dirges going on?" while they were playing). (Criminal IQ) dm

CONCUBINE FORMING "The Guilt Will Kill" (Big Neck CD) What is the guilt that will kill this band? Could it be sounding pretty much exactly like Big Black? (Big Neck) wkm

the MYSTERY GIRLS "Something In The Water" (In The Red CD) If I point out the minuses of this album there's gonna be the knee jerk "What a snob! They've gone on to bigger things so Mr record reviewer considers them damaged goods now" reaction. Then again...if I just talk talk about the sweet parts of it the same types of clowns are gonna hiss "Well of course he isn't gonna bag on it. He's pals with them and puts out the occasional 45 by 'em so he has a vested interest in them selling records." If one goes into this expecting the brain bending monster that these boys can and hopefully will set to tape someday-they're gonna have to wait (though the song "This Is Stereo" wah-wah'd feedback and "I'm peaking" sound battle should be enough to feed any tripper's head for the time being). If you're fiending for some Yardbirdsian/MC5-ish worship you'll get your kicks off the harmonica dosed rowdy R&B rave ups like "My Bed/Her Home" and "Tossin' and Turnin'" but that sound doesn't dominate the album either. "Something In The Water" is the sound of a band stretching it's arms and legs reaching for different things instead of grabbing for the same couple things over and over again. Adding bits and pieces like Radio Birdman's drive, Gram Parsons junkie country and Raspberries like pop sprinkles into their stew it's isn't another "Back From The Grave" go round (though the band may have found inspiration's in that stuff they never screamed it that loud anyways). The songs are a lot more detailed and developed showing them starting to come into something completely their own thing out of what they've taken and learned but the album lacks the manic frustration and nervous energy of their debut. Some have blamed Jim Diamond's production on this "two day special" but the Girls themselves admit that they rushed it through just to get it done instead of paying any special attention to things. With that being said "Something In The Water" is not a bad album. It's a really good album, one of the best this year actually. The high points of are higher than their debut it's just that there aren't as many of them. (the Mystery Girls) dm

the LOCOMOTIONS s/t (Dead Beat CD) Ok let's write all of my reviews again thanks to the shitty enhanced CD that hijacked my explorer window (see Smut Peddlers review) These guys come at you like a punch knocking out your favorite Misfits ex-lead singer. Twangy guitars aplenty make this Jack Saints-esque record a for sure winner with my neighbors on my ever so loud stereo and it damn near blew my tweeters. I pushed the volume envelope with this one. (the Locomotions) bb

the LOCOMOTIONS "Teacher" (Big Neck 7in EP) Everyone's favorite Scandinavian junk pickers slam bang through 4 songs here. Two originals and two covers (one of which is John Forgarty's "Almost Saturday Night" which is one of my most favorite songs of all time) recorded at Toe Rag for that beat up paperbag style and a speaker found in a lost corner of the basement sound. (Big Neck) dm

the REAL LOSERS "Go Nutzoid" (Wrench 7in EP) Another fine slab of artery cloggin' thump from THE band of current trash-o-rama royalty. Bancroft records had first dibs on two of the songs that appear on this for the record we did with 'em but I couldn't afford to tack on a private jet along to our standard contract of a lifetime supply of Burger King gift certificates and a late model Cadillac. Ohh..but if only we could have!!! Four pieces of Ramones via Teengenerate via "Back From The Grave" via low budget English ale that makes you puke on the corner rock-n-roll. Not only do the Real Losers grab the guts of the young they have even pull in the young at heart too! It's Hot Dog, the Real Losers drummer, who got her father to pose on the cover of this kicking out the 100% Lucha Libre style! Right there proves they're cooler than you!!! (Wrench Records) dm

the ASTROGLIDES "Channel Surfing With..." (Fast Music CD) Isn't "Astroglide" the name of some butt lube prefered by gay guys? Aren't gay guys into 80's pop and Judy Garland? Maybe some of them like surf inflected homages of NOFX style punk rock too. (Fast Music) wkm

the MINDS "Plastic Girls" (Alien Snatch LP) If ya dig the Flip-Tops you'll most likely get into this. It's the same singer. A Zippy Rezillos thing with the keyboards mixed WAY up in the front.(Alien Snatch) dm

the KNOCKERS "Last Time" (High School Reject 7in EP) I've had a Knockers demo in my car for a couple of years now. That's where I listen to casettes and I listened to that one a whole bunch. There's nothing like sitting at stop light and having some jackass pull up next to me with their bass speakers booming, rattling the quarter panels and shaking a big pile of rust from their ride on to the concrete and me cranking the tape up to combat having to hear what they're listening too. The digatized and computerized beats could were no match for the ear searing treble and 4 track tape hiss of the Knockers. I wanted to do a 7inch to have my favorites off of it on a more permanent format than a casette that was quickly degenerating from me playing it all the time but was informed that the band broke up in about the same amount as time as it took them to write and record the songs. More than a few folk in the record biz that, especially in these days of the entire music industry, that releasing records by a band that isn't even around was not a wise business move...so I passed. Luckily, there's Dutchmen don't mind being a little reckless with their cash like Koos at High School Reject.

"Last Time" was one of my favorites from that tape and here it is in all it rusted fish hook glory. Casey and Gus (ya know them from the Strong Come Ons) are the rhythm section for two other Algoma, Wisconsin delinquents doing something that sounds like the Rip Offs if they admired Flipper for their sludge but found it a little too lumbering so some bathtub crank was brought in to liven things up. The other two songs are from a reunion recording of more recent vintage 'cept Gus got drunk and forgot to show so Mystery Girls bassman Mike Zink sits in on the drum stool. Gus, Casey and one of the other dudes are now 3/4 of Hue Blanc's Joyless Ones. Look for a record by 'em on Todd "Door County Party Enforcer" Tricknee's label soon (High School Reject) dm

the SUNDAY DRUNKS "On The Prowl" (Dead Beat CD) Well well well. 2 Dead Beat Records CD's this month and their both winners. Me personally, I'm too hung over on Sunday to even think about getting drunk. Hell, I can't even roll a doobie so Sundays in my house consist of bong hits and blues but I think I could find space in my Sunday rotation for these guys. Once again thank you God for Texas! Bits of the Hot Pockets float to the surface in this muddy Tejas arroyo and I like it. (Dead Beat) bb

BBQ s/t (Alien Snatch CD) One man band BBQ aka Creepy of the Spaceshits aka Bridge Mixture of Les Sexareenos aka Blortz aka Mark Sultan and so on gets his feet a-stompin' on the floorboards, his fingers a-twangin' the guitar and his lungs a-blarin' and whoops up one wild jamboree! The ghosts of Gene and Eddie supply the fuel for BBQ getting the charcoal and hickory chunks red hot enough for the rock-n-roll rack of ribs he's grilling up. There's lots of people doing the one man band thing these days but when BBQ gets the grease splattering & slathers it all up with his own special recipe, which is just the right amount of rockabilly brown sugar, bump & grind vinegar and punk rock hot sauce, it sure be damn tasty. (BBQ's website) dm

TUB RING "Zoo Hypothesis" (Underground CD) In the press sheet they proudly mention associating with the likes of Dog Fashion Disco and Mr Bungle. That impresses me as about as much if they bragged about having a retarded cousin. Wait a minute-I take that back. Bragging about mentally impaired relatives would probably impress me more than the band itself. It sounds like Bare Naked Ladies and some super serious prog-metal band like Isis switching off every 10 seconds. What are they? A bunch of fucking frustrated band class nerds who ran out of medication? I needed a new drink coaster so my living table doesn't get nasty beer bottle rings all over it. Call it ironic if you want to but this Tub Ring CD is serving that particular duty now. (Underground) wkm

the ILLNESSES "I Wanna Die" (Pop Quiz 7in EP) These four bits of Texas trash punk were recorded in 1997 but haven't see the light of day til this. Dunno why they didn't get released then but here they are now. One could easily imagine them doing a record or two for Rip Off. Sometimes when "great lost bands" are exhumed it can be dissappointing but for those who dig spazzy & overdriven punk rock snotballs this record is worth tracking down. (Pop Quiz Records) dm

the SICK FITS "Mirror Creeps" (Big Neck 7in EP) Weirdo punk rock...but doesn't really FEEL or sound weird though. Either it's having kindred tastes with bands like the Clone Defects but not yet finding thier own warp to put into it or they are trying really hard to sound just like the Clone Defects. Too reserved, too restrained...like they are afraid to cut thier own path and are following someone else's a little to closely. (the Sick Fits) dm

the DIRGES "Cold River" (Missile X 7in) Punk rock soul music courtesy of Ross of the Brides and the Baseball Furies Aron. These two songs kick in the teeth of lesser stabs at the form (cough...Mooney Suzuki...cough) and mop the floor up with 'em like the limp wrists they are. (Missle X) dm

TEXAS TERRI BOMB! "Your Lips...My Ass!" (TKO CD) There's rock-n-roll bitches and then there's ROCK-N-ROLL BITCHES! Texas Terri takes no shit! When in her presence don't address her as simply Terri. She will whip your ass then celebrate it over a liter of rotgut. "That's TEXAS TERRI and don't you forget it!" she'll remind you in a voice that sounds like rattlesnake skin then kick your in the ribs with her boots again. She is such a bad ass ROCK-n-ROLL BITCH that she has Cheetah Chrome as her touring guitarist (well him and Icky Fatt-errr-I mean-Ricky Ratt of the Trash Brats), get's people like Wayne Kramer, Cherie Currie and the guy from Faster Pussycat to appear on her record and the legendary producer Jack Douglas (Aerosmith, Alice Cooper etc) to record it. I'm going down to the liquor store, picking up a fifth of Jack Daniels and listening to this a couple more times. Then when the bottle is empty I'll smash it across my own face. (TKO) wkm

CLAMBAKE "Gator In The Pool" (Gringo CD) Here's a two piece band from England where both members share the same last name. I'm guessing they are brothers...maybe they are cousins...Who knows, they could be father and son for all I know. They 're shooting for a Mosrite like twang surf meets Cramps-a-billy sound BUT the instrumentals suffer from almost "metal" effects from time to time (but didn't Dick(head) Dale once declare himself the inventor of heavy metal?) and the vocals songs suffer from...well, the vocals. (Gringo) dm

Okay....I'm still playing catch up....Since this review page is for Sept. and Oct I (and some of our other contributors) should have enough time to get caught up with what has been missed. This should mean there will be another update REALLY soon...but don't hold us to it

Back to Smashin' Transistors